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#3 Funniest Reply A Cop Gave In Court

This guy was nearly six times over the limit.

Malky McEwan
2 min readApr 2, 2021
Photo by Priscilla Du Preez on Unsplash

The call came, a drunk woman was trying to trade sex for a spare tire in broad daylight at a busy intersection.

When the police arrived they found her companion, also very drunk, sitting in the parking lot of a former gas station — now a framing shop. His pickup truck, with a flat tire, was jammed against the curb.

The owner of the shop placed the man behind the wheel when he cut through her property and flattened his tire. The cops arrested him for Driving Under the Influence (DUI) and her for public intoxication.

He agreed to a breath test and his results were the highest they’d ever seen. He had a 0.46 Blood Alcohol Content (BAC) — the legal limit is 0.08 BAC. He was nearly six times over the limit.

The cops remembered their training, someone with a BAC that high is likely suffering from alcohol poisoning. Doctors would tell you they should be unconscious and you should be concerned. With a count that high, they might die.

Even so, the guy is walking, talking and asking for a cigarette. Following protocol, they took him to the hospital, and he was fine. Six months later, in court, the cop is being questioned by the guy’s attorney.

“Officer Riley, you…

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Malky McEwan
Malky McEwan

Written by Malky McEwan

Born storyteller. Born curious. Fascinated with what makes people tick and how the world works. https://malkymcewan.medium.com/subscribe

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